Humans are not only selfish by nature but survivalists, whether in groups/communities/cliches/marriages or solo. For those that tend to run in smaller pacts I have this question: When the thought of reaching out to someone, do you find it selfish because that is what YOU feel at the moment? Or does it get put upon your spirit for a reason? Could it be a natural reaction to you or the other involved pulling on the spirit?
If we listen to the spirit that is pulling on us we should first discern what type of spirit it is. “Am I just lonely and need a friend to talk to that would not otherwise hear from me?”, we could ask ourselves. Maybe that is a life saving moment that needed to occur in order to keep surviving in a healthier way.
What about when it is not a survival need, but a selfish one. Not wanting to give up a connection to someone that you know is not a healthy relationship that you should be in can be toxic. Do you aim for survival or “tough it out” until you find that person you should be connecting with? What are the discerning factors?
In my life I have battled many things, still do. But, I’ve also got really great at figuring out when relationships are one sided. I tend to stay away from those because it never seems to last the lifetime that some relationships are built to do, and yet I have managed to keep hope and faith in one’s that I keep a distance from.
So, how do figure out which relationships are meant to stay or go? What type of assessment helps you decide? Does it matter if you have some kind of ties to the person (I.e. family, business, etc.)? How much time do you allow before removing yourself or giving it a fair go?
Comment below and let me know.