Emotional abuse, what do YOU do?

Have you ever felt the sadness inflicted on you by another person, just moments after you’ve made a stride and felt great? Maybe you have watched a friend or family member endure this type of scenario.
This is the definition of emotional abuse.
When suffering with such abuse people turn to many things: Spirituality, Therapy, Creativity, and even self-destructive measures (drugs and alcohol).
When these things no longer bring relief, what do you suggest while watching someone struggle with this lifestyle?
Do you offer support?
Do you give them resources to reach out to?

Do you stay silent?

Is it time to step in and step up? How involved is too involved in another’s life these days?

Think about it

Can You See Beyond Your Walls?

Many people today are working so hard in their jobs that they don’t have time to see outside, to recognize what is going on from a larger spectrum.

This can be thought of in a deeper way as well. Do we take the time to look at our lives (not just our jobs/careers) to see what is going on from others perspectives? Or notice the little things around us that we maybe missing out on?

Some people may think this is a “hippie dippie” attitude or scoff at the idea itself, and I’m here to say….it is the answer to maintaining a sense of peace that the rat-race will never provide.

Studies have shown that working until you fall over is not only counter productive but it is also making us sick.

Taking a step back (even when you feel everything will fall apart if you do), is sometimes the only way to let go of the idea that YOU have to hold everything on your shoulders to get to a happier place and completion.

Of course there are times in life that are hard, and yes, we have to put in hard work to learn new things and grow…..but does that mean we should be working to the extent of complete exhaustion and/or panic and anxiety?

Try something new today

Take just five minutes (DO NOT LOOK AT THE CLOCK!) and breathe. Do nothing else.

At the very least, try to free your mind of anything you need to do…and enjoy the sunshine, smell a flower, really taste something that you enjoy. Five minutes. Remember to take time to jump out of your limited view and see/experience something else to help maintain joy in your life.

I hope this helps someone today.

Remember if you know of someone that struggles with mental illness or is just having a rough season in life, there is help out there.

At any time they (or yourself) can text 741741 for free assistance and someone to talk/text to. You may also type in NAMI to a search engine to help you find local resources to help out in times of need.

Look at the grass, do you walk on it?

Growing up we were taught to stay off people’s grass and to not pick flowers without permission from the owners of the property. There is a reason for this….

There are people who take pride in the place they dwell in. So much that they invest money, time, and effort into that area. The quote “the grass is greener where you water it” is true!

While you may be a person who would rather the pavement vs grass for the sake of not having to water or “invest” the time and energy, you should still take into account a broom (because any area can get messy), just make sure you don’t use it to turn into someone who would fly on it rather than care about how others feel about their property.

When you make a decision on where to stay, do you take into account the look of the environment or do you only care about pricing? Does this make a difference on how you choose to manage the area while you are there? (I.e. Would you clean up after yourself in a slum area or dump your garbage anywhere? Do you expect someone will come make your bed for you if you are paying enough for an individual to be paid to do those things?)

How do you feel about your environment? Do you need to invest more time, energy, and possibly finances to make it something to be proud of?

How can this be related to any area of your life? Think about it.

Feathers surround me

It hurts so much that I don’t know who you are

Forced to love you in prayer and from afar

Hearing your voice everywhere I go

It pains me that I knew you would never show

Still wishing for mistletoe, a kiss, and the hug that erases any pain

The holidays are gone once again, and I’m left with distain

Broken and crying I will give myself today

Tomorrow God will make a new way

The road is calling and the songs I will sing

A change in scenery is what the new day will bring

When God’s promises come into fruition, I do not know

I will use this time wisely and continue to grow

Someday soon my true love and I will be together

For it was proven by the sight of a feather

God does not lie but shows me signs

Ones that only can be done by the divine

So, I continue to wait and see

What God has in store just for me

Let’s talk about the financial divide in our society for a moment

Why is it that I can work in the beauty industry part time at a salary that is equivalent to a full-time position of someone who works in the mental health field? One is declaring an expectation of how society should look playing on the materialism that we all fall into, and the other is forced to help those who are overwhelmed by societies’ outlook and is just trying to fit in, as best they can, with some sort of implied disadvantage.

In this last year I have learned that there is no right answer to the problem that our society continues to keep itself in when it comes to financial “status”. People have decisions to make based on their circumstances and the ones that they chose and/or chose to change.

I came to this realization because I suffer from depression and chose to stay off medication. This gives me a lot of insight to the mental health field from several perspectives (because I have also navigated the system as a parent prior to my diagnosis). * It is because of this that I cherish the people I have worked with throughout the mental health community. I know it is their heart for people (and usually love for God or some form of belief) that sustains them…. because it is not the paycheck. This heart/love makes the mental health field is a very tight knit community.

I work part time in the beauty industry. Not only is it part of my selfcare to put myself together and show up somewhere that requires me to “look good” ….it actually helps me “feel” good because I feel like I look good (somedays more than others). There are people within this industry that are not there for the same reasons I am, they live their lives materialistically and are very surface-based individuals…. but don’t be fooled and judge too quickly…. not all of them are! Many of the girls I have encountered are young, just learning about life, and where and how they want to be in it. I encourage them to enjoy looking pretty and feeling good about themselves while they do it, why not? I have also met some amazing women who have gone through incredible journeys to overcome hardships and landed on their feet because they embraced taking on their own careers in the beauty industry. It is a tight community as well…. but beware, it can also be very competitive. Money and numbers are usually the (not so camouflaged) driving force behind this industry.

This is where the two communities collide. When looking to better your future and taking on a new career tear you up, you need the support from the opposite side to help you push through (this can be said for any industry you attempt to dive into). Does that mean you can trust everyone in the mental health community and not the beauty industry? No! Choosing your team of mental health professionals is extremely important and that is another blog to come.

My point in breaking this down is this: We all have a part to play in life, and sometimes it changes, and sometimes the players change. The key is to respect yourself, and others as you (and they) navigate through where you are, who you are, and who you choose to be. We are all necessary to keep pushing forward.

I hope that something I have learned will help someone else be a little less critical/judgmental today as we start our new year with the attempt to be a little less divided.

For additional information about how to get services for your mental health please go to Nami.org or google: mental health help near me for a list of local providers available to you.

* Let me first say that my choice is not right for everyone, and sometimes not right for me. I get lost and sad sometimes and it is the worst kind of warfare to get out of when it remains in your mind. So please make sure that you do not think you are some sort of God and manage your medication without the help (or at least advice) from a trained professional

What happens when she dies

What happens when she dies
When the warrior inside her surrenders
What happens when she puts down her sword
She lets her walls crash around her
The world will see her vulnerable and stripped of everything
Would anyone think twice or notice
Will she become an easy target
Or will she be embraced by something she never experienced
Will a power greater than her take away the pain and suffering
Never will she know until she waves the white flag

Love even those who do not love

There will be people in your life that accept you in a room they feel confident in
There will be people who acknowledge your presence in a public environment
These can be the same people that do not accept you as their equal in all rooms (whether you deserve the mutual respect or not).
Knowing who you are and who God created you to be will always be more important than how someone else sees you
He can see through walls that we cannot